Who is that behind the curtain? It's mom.

Carol, before her name legally changed to "Mom"

So it’s mother’s day, which means I should be invading my mother’s house right now. For me this just involves getting out of bed, putting my face on, and getting in the car. For mom it means cleaning the house, buying food, cooking the food, playing hostess, and possibly not sitting down for the entire day. This is pretty typical for every mother, and it’s kind of backwards if you ask me. So today my mother is off at some festival, and I’ll meet her later for pizza. It’s her day, that’s what she wants to do, so that’s exactly what she’ll get. 

I’ve learned that every mom has her niche. I know some amazing scout leader-moms, moms that can sew wedding dresses, moms that can bake 50 cupcakes in less than an hour. My mom is none of these. You’d be hard pressed to find her clamoring towards the kitchen to bake for the masses.

My mom is the “I’m going to do something for you and you won’t even know it” mom. I didn’t realize this until a few years ago, when all those magical childhood memories come into focus and you realize that someone was behind the curtain. It was mom.

Here’s how she does it. Many years ago mom heard about a family that was struggling financially, and was hard-pressed to have a Merry Christmas. Mom decides to help. Things mom does not do: she does not ask for donations, make flyers with their names plastered on it, or ask them for a list of toys the children want. In other words, she does not embarrass them. Mom just goes to the store and buys the toys, she discreetly gives them to the family, and she tells no one.

Or a few years later, when she found out a friend had cancer. Mom is a true dog lover, and had trained one of her prized champion herding dogs to function as a therapy dog. Hearing that her friend would spend hours at the hospital receiving chemotherapy, she gave her the dog. Just asked her to stop by the house one day and convinced the friend that she would be doing mom a tremendous favor if she took the dog home.

You don’t just give away a champion show dog, especially one that you love with all your heart. But she had a friend in need- and that friend needed a dog who could sit by her side while in the hospital. In mom’s eyes, it was just a perfect fit.

Cheyenne, our favorite girl.

The best memory I have of mom’s magic was when she bought our house, and I was four years old. Here’s how the story went in my eyes:

Mom says we’re going to look for a new house. We go to many houses until we find the perfect one. There is a yard and a park out back. There is a big basement for all my toys. There is a perfect bedroom with a pretty tree outside the window. This is my room. I must have this house.

I go to school, and I draw pictures of the house. I dream up stories about all the adventures I will have in the park behind the house. I decide that I will have a dog at this house, and she will sleep with me in my bed and we will wake up in the morning and look outside at our tree.

We move- into an apartment. We move out of our townhouse and into an apartment. This sucks. I draw more pictures and tell more stories. I whine excessively. I tell her I want to live in that house and I want a white poster bed with Rainbow Brite sheets and I want a dog and I want that park. I interrogate her about the house- for six months.

My whining pays off. Mom says we can visit the house again and if my poster bed with Rainbow Brite sheets is there, then we can stay.

We go to the house. It’s empty. Completely empty. I sulk my way up the stairs. I go to the bedroom and open the door- and there is my bed. My brand new bed and Rainbow Brite sheets and curtains and a dresser and EVERYTHING. We move in that weekend, and soon after we get a dog.

So here’s what really happened:

Mom puts the townhouse up for sale. As the agent is installing the sign out front, a man drives by and asks to see the house. He buys it that day. Mom frantically looks for a new house, and finds one. It’s a closed bid, which means everyone who wants it submits an envelope with a bid on the house and the owners decide which to take.

The owners take mom’s bid, but they’re new house isn’t ready. They rent the house back from mom for six months. Since our townhouse has sold, we have to move into an apartment until the house is ready.

She lives with a whining and badgering four year old in a tiny apartment for six agonizing months.

Mom gets the keys to the house and orders that damn bed I’ve been screaming about. She asks a friend to help her set it up. They turn the room into the perfect little girl hideaway, and leave the rest of the house empty.

She picks me up from school, takes me to the house, and waits at the bottom of the stairs for me to find my perfect bedroom. She waited six months to stand at those stairs.

I have a million other memories of Mom’s finest moments, but this will always be my favorite. She still lives in that house today, and she still has one of the many pictures I drew of it. It may be just a house, but for me it will always be the house that magically became my home.

So this mother’s day; do not let mom do the dishes, no matter how much she fights you. Maybe get her a cup of coffee. Even better- host dinner at your house. And thank her for all those things she ever did without you ever even realizing it. Because motherhood is said to be a thankless job; but it doesn't have to be.